The weeks go by

I am still here dealing everyday at time, I can not lie there are easy and hard days but I know time is the best cure for everything.  I try to keep busy as well as the kids, thank God I have met a bunch of new people in this town, when I am about to leave. But it does not really matter I am not going too far neither.

 Amir you are my novio I just love being next to me.  Nenas you make my life but Amir every time I see you smile or take a step I just realize that God is watching over me putting you in my life.

 Samia you love the swings now and you go very high not being scared.  My little princess is growing up so fast. Te amo mi princesa del drama.

 And here is the smile I was talking about,  you are just my happy camper at all times.

The other day we went to a Quincanera party the kids and I had so much fun.  They are becoming this late owls with all of these parties we being going to lately.  Is nice after all baba was not much of a social bee, unlike mami that loves to be around people and interact...one more of the things I had giving up.

Going and going

Life does not change everyday I learn a new lie about the person that has turn my world upside down.  Is hard to imagine somebody can be such a devil and just manipulate things to their own way, but in this world there is a God and  he takes care of everything.

Abu would be going back home tomorrow, again I will be alone missing her and her company but my reality is those 3 little ones. 

Samia sadly you have become collarate damage in this situation, is hard explaining to you what is going on my only thing is reassuring you that you are a special gilr and no mattter what happens between baba and mami you and your brother and sister had nothing to do with it.

Not many pictures this days they go to fast everyday something happens, and everyday I have more faith, hopefully we would get out of this mess soon.  Is an avalanche in top of me and everyday I feel the snow gets thinner and thinner.  

Nenes always remember mami and baba love you and if mistakes are made please forgive us.

One more day of play showers and fun

Nenes I have learn in the past 3 years that is not the 100 dollar toy that makes you guys happy, is hard to judge but sometimes the thing I least expect to entertain you those it. I  I had being working in making another felt tent like last years but the truth is that you guys go under the table but lately have not really show much interest in it.  So I decided just to make panels with different scenarios and some dress up dolls.  I made everything out of felt with different change of clothes...as of now we have a mermaid costume, a princes costume, a bathing suit and I will make more.

It has being a complete hit you guys play for hours making up stories, even the little ponies enjoy the stories.  I took the pattern for the dolls from paper dolls is a very cool website called Making Friends so what I did was print out the pattern and then I let them choose what costume they want and I make it out of felt is very easy, cheap and fast.

Showers that has change allot at home, before since they did not go to school they always took a shower at night, but now that they go to school I don't believe in sending my kids to school with NO SHOWER  and sorry for those that read this and take no showers in the morning that is DISGUSTING...

I remember being small in Colombia in very cold cities and always taking a shower in the morning that shit did not go with Abuela, that is gross.  I always tell my nenas we sweat at night everywhere, and since we sweat we need to shower.  I do accept that washing the hair everyday can be tedious and not healthy specially in curly hair so Abu gave us the solution, that same way she did when I was a little girl.

Amir you on the other hand take a shower at night, however the moment you can stand in the shower you go in the mornings.  You love your shower time and like everything about you SMILES and more SMILES

I always get this guilty feeling I don't take enough pictures with you guys, I get that feeling because every time I see a picture of me with Abu or Abuelo I get so happy and treasure those more than the ones that is just me alone...I will assume you guys would feel the same thing so I try but is hard since is always me home alone with the nenes.

Fun stories and scary stories!!

Lets start by the fun things.

I carved my first pumpkin for the kids, I had never done them but Samia and Gamila wanted one so bad so I had them choose a design and I went into my carving adventure it was so much fun. I don't know what was better carving them or trying to take a picture of them with their pumpkins.

  This is my favorite

 Amir you saw your pumpkin and decided that Milo's was much bigger and cooler I think.

 Gamila got upset at Amir trying to grab hers so she gave us the mean look while Amir decided his was much easier to grab.

 Samia started making silly noises so Amir and Gamila decided they were going to put attention to her and not to mami.

And finally looking at MAMI....by these time baba was giving up on all of us.

Samia and GAmila were of great help with the cleaning of the pumpkin they separated all of the seeds so we could roast them.

And here are our spicy seeds. 

Now the scary story mami ended up in the hospital yesterday because apparently I am allergic to Benedryl...yes I took it and an hour after I could not breath and my body was numb and the scariest part was when the paramedics could not even find my blood pressure....and once I made it to the hospital my blood pressure was so high they had the Dr. and nursers running to bring it down.  I was finally let go and today thank God my blood pressure is under control..

NYU

Going to Abu's house always means going thru old boxes of pictures and remembering the little things about my childhood here and in Colombia...and for some weird reason Abu does not let me take the pictures with  me...she wants to hold on to them.  I only get to see them and scan them or take pictures of them...she is like a security officer next to me looking at them and making sure they all go back in her treasure box.  I wonder does she looks at them when she is alone.  Nenes Abu got marry very young having Tio Cesar at 14 I always find she is too young too have the children and grandchildren she has. 

Nenes remember there is time for everything, in a persons life the word late never exist you are only late to appointments.

I was surprise to come across my NYU ID...she holds on to it, and looking at the picture I can see how naive I was when I first left home thinking life was easy and everything goes easy...I was in for a huge surprise,

nenes the hardest part was not being in a big city working and paying school, the hardest part was being alone not having Abu around.  Nenes and in no shape of form I am saying that staying always around your parents is the thing to do, in today's world we need to explore other places and learn to be alone, solitude only makes you stronger.  It makes you reflect on what you had at home, you learn to treasure your parents and the beliefs and values they teach you. And the best part of all of these is that there is always baba's and mami's home to go back to, and that is how I felt I always had Abu's house to go back..but then my inner desire to not give up keep me going, how could I go back to Miami without accomplishing anything that push me to do better in school and at work and to make Abu proud of me.

And I know one day I will feel the same anguish Abu felt that June 5, 1997 I left to NYC...in my white fiesta ford I drove all the way from Miami to Queens, NY...not knowing how difficult was to have a car in NYC I had to call Tio Fabio to come and pick up the car back a couple of weeks after.  I know you only learn by firsthand experience when you have to wake up at 5 o'clock in the morning on a Tuesday morning to move the car because that day they are cleaning that side of the road so you have to drive around for hours at times waiting for someone leaving that the day before had gotten a stop on the opposite side...having to do this every day for a car that I could not even take to work or school, because parking for a month  int he city would end up being more than what I made in a week.  I promise you nenes as you get older I will enlighten you guys with my adventures.

Went to Mexico and back in LA

So the heat is on with a vengeance is amazing we are not even in summer and the temperatures are fuming.  Samia is out of school and most of the summer activities have not started yet so the vast majority of our day is spend in the pool.

This past weekend we finish painting some stuff around the house and the girls also helped us afterwards we all decided to take a dive in our huge pool..yes even mami and baba.

Nenas baba was making you guys laugh so much saying we were in Mexico with our inflatable palm trees...nenes you guys would enjoy baba so much he can be so serious but so goofy at the same time, is just one of the many great traits he has.

Random here and there

Amir you are growing so much is amazing what 3 weeks can do, but also keep on consideration nene I am awake every 2.5 hours feeding you these days...for some reason you just think that between 3 AM to 5 AM is played time, why you can not go back to sleep like you usually do in your other feedings.  Hopefully soon you realize what day and night is..Yeah right mami, I think like a year has to go by before you know the difference between the sun and the moon.

Samia you are really keeping me busy this days the truth is that between and Amir and Gamila you take much more out of me either by talking to you, trying to make you understand why we are not suppose to do this or that, another thing I have notice about you is that you like to tell others what to do, hard to believe that you are so quite and calm but love delegating others what you are suppose to do.

Next week guido and zetu should be arriving...I know las nenas are going to enjoy them so much.  Samia I have also being looking into what kind of summer programs you are going this year so far I have found a dance and a karate and also another like a pre k preparation. Oh and defiantly swimming and tball...wow busy schedule but nena I have come to realize you need structure and just staying home not doing anything it does not work. 


Oh Samia before I forget every time I reprehend you..you always give me a look and surely say something like 

"Mami I love you!!!!"


Nenes just so you know what goes thru mami's head this days:
I try to do things every time Amir is sleeping yes I don't stay still, I also try to read as much I can to you guys, mami also wants a new sewing machine hers is acting up royally after owning a Singer for many years and never having a problem I decided to buy a Kenmore and wow they are not even half as good as a Singer so I think this time I will go for a Singer once again..I want one that does some kind of quilting I want to try to teach myself to Quilt.

I know I always want but I guess in today's world when you turn on the TV there are commercials when you go online there are commercials is hard to resist, although I am not getting this it does not hurt to want it and read about it and follow it etc etc...After Tio Cesar came and show me his Apple computer I would love to have one...but not right now mine still works and I prefer a sewing machine versus a new laptop.


What baba thinks about this days... a NEW car yes ours is a lease and we are about to finish it so we are into looking for a new car that can pull the travel trailer we are getting this year, we miss the camping but with 3 children a tent is not for us anymore specially the bathroom situation we would be spending the whole night running to the hamam...so yes he is into the car and the travel trailer...The car I don't care much for but the travel trailer that I can not wait for.

Nenas this goes for you guys, I have people ask me how I can do it with 3 and alone and nenas is not easy in life nothing is hard as longest you are organize and not lazy wake up early and your day would always be a better one...follow this always in life waking up early and being organize can make a huge difference.

Los amo!!!!

Handy family!

Let's start by saying SI MAMI DESDE EL 21 NO PONGO FOTOS NUEVAS...SORRY!

Abuela call me this morning telling me that since the 21st there are no new pics and she knows there are many new things around the house.


Let's start by saying that we have being very very bussy, we have being submerge in paint, sand, pavers, treee branches, card stock, paint swatch paper, water, mud etc etc.

This project was started over a month ago, first we put sand all over the area we wanted to make the patio, then baba put down the pavers, I put the sand and sweep it baba mist with water is a long tedious process. Afterwards we had to put the border I did this yesterday and today I could barely move my arms from hammering. We love the way it looks!!!! We also went to the extend of redoing plant pots out of the containers we got the sand in.

While we work las nenas have fun being silly they just love to hang around when we are working.

We also wanted to paint the doors around the house, since we purchase the house in such a hurry we were never happy with the color it was a dull green color. So we first wanted a terracotta color we gear up and got it and when we tried it in the door it looked orange...so at this point we just went with a brown color more common and we knew it gas going to look good. We did the door and the rim. We still have the front door, plus the patio door, this is one is the car port.

On friday I went over my friends Bonnie house and she recently painted her house and it look great and soon she would be doing her girls room .....I left her house thinking I need to do some painting in las nenas room. But I was not 100% sure, plus the girls are growing up so fast, that they likes change, and I have to admit I hate seeing the same decor all the time. So I started thinking what I could do. I had seen this bird mobiles, they use real tree branches and I love the idea. So then I started looking at decor pages in the internet and here and there I took some ideas and came out with this. Everything is made out of card stock and the paint little papers you find in the paint department at Lowe's. It was funny Saturday I spend the whole morning picking up little color papers, baba was like Mistika they are going to stop us with all the ones you pick.


I have never being a drawer but I was amaze how was able to draw the different types of butterflies and the little birds silhouettes. I also attached everything with the removable glue dots, this way when ever I want to take it down is easy. I think if I send $4 in this decoration was allot.

I guess I am gettting older and proving myself I can draw!!!!!

How mami feels!

I can not believe how fast time goes, I am already going into my 14 weeks of pregnancy finally is hitting me that soon Inshallah it would be 3 children.

Baby when I first found out I was pregnant I have to admit I was not only surprise but overwhelmed thinking of all of the responsibility that was coming our way. Children are a blessing from God but one has to also accept that they are a huge responsibility not only money wise but in so many others ways. Saying this I also have to mention that one of the things I love about having children is that they make me a better person, they are the motive that I live everyday to be a better human being. Knowing that I am the main example my children see, makes me pinch myself when I say or do things that are not nice. I always think how can I l correct them of doing or saying something when I do it.

Samia you you inspire me to listen to others and be patient, that is what I see in your eyes when you talk to me.


Gamila you make me giggle and see everything full of color, that is what I feel when I hear your voice or I feel those small hands touch my face.


Baby you are making me very sensitive and I can not wait to hold you in my arms and discover everything about you.

Nenas mami inside!!

When you become a mom and your kids start growing and noticing things, you have to change your bad habits..is the right thing to do however is not easy.


I get mad at my nenas because they put their fingers in their mouth...but in reality is not fair I am 34 and I still bite my nails how can I explain that to them....no way I have tried over the years but the longest I can go without biting them is 3 week and when I start seeing them how cute they look, bang I do it again.


I love to drink milk out of the cartoon...how can I reprehend them when they are old enough to get the carton and do it, I guess I still have a couple of years till it happens.


I have to admit when I am in a thinking mood I catch myself putting my hair in my mouth...now that Samia is doing it I can not blame her, I think she learned it from me.


I love to eat with a spoon when I am home, but how can I expect my girls to use the fork instead.

Is not easy being a mom especially that you have to be so persistent if you want to see your kids being raise the right way...something I have learn in these short period of time I have being a mom is that one thing that is not allow in motherhood is LAZINESS if you say NO it has to stay NO 24 hours a day 7 days a week....so looking at things in these perspective my bad habits of biting my nails, my hair etc.....I have to work in them.


Nenas with these I want you to know that nobody is perfect even mami has tons and tons of bad things, but the important thing is to know that we have them and we try to work on them. God made us with defects so we could work on them and become better individuals.

Funny times

So yesterday and today I being doing mayor cleaning taking advantage that Abuela is here..so I found a wig from a manequi I have from my days selling in EBAY my belly dancing stuff so I decided to put it on and go and show abuela just for a moment of fun...when Abuela saw me she took a picture right away.  She had bring a couple of pictures from my young days and what we found was a picture of me when I was little wearing a wig.

Abuela was laughing so hard and remembering when I was a little girl.

 

On another note I think this type of hair it surely makes me look old.

New Year!

So finally the birthday festivities are over..

Today we had her birthday party many of her friends came over and it was a very pleasant morning..I was good I was not picking up after every single paper plate or paper cup I saw...I control myself..I was a bit preoccupied over the space but my apartment proved to hold very well the crowd.

We finally got to cut the much much worked Wow, Wow, Wubbzy cake The process was a long one but so worth it.

Here are few pics of the birthday party:

Here are all the kids that came over of course Ms. Gamila had to do one of her shows!!! Sorry Samia your sissy was having a difficult day.

I am not sure if is me or most of the moms out there but when you have small children we go by our children faces we know what is coming next just by at the facial expression.

While going thru the pictures today of the party I came across your two faces the ones that you use all the time and I love them...especially the one that makes your two dimples stand out.

Samia with this I close this year and I embrace the following year with open arms and an open mind to raise you to best of my knowledge, I only ask papito Dios (God) to guide me the right way and to help me be a better person so I can be a better mami.